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Literature
Creeping like snails
While walking dark and muddy paths,
I came upon this fray
With endless hoardes of demon kids,
All clad in black and grey.
Their faces pale and  clothing ripped,
Their fingers in to fists were gripped,
They cried aloud, quietly first:
'I hate my life! So do your worst!'
'Alright' I said, 'you crazy shits!'
'I'll chop your stupid ass to bits!'
My weapon whirred its baneful song,
'Hold on!' I said 'It won't be long!'
Chainsaw lifted above my head,
I charged in to the evil dead:
Limbs sawn off and eyes removed,
'Hey' I said 'That's much improved!'
The zombies came on thick and fast
I cleft them all atwain,
I would stand there to the last,
'Screw you guys, again!'
But after hours of endless blood,
Hope spied its way to me,
And cut limbs down in to the mud,
Which formed an endless sea.
Amongst the endless limbs he sat,
His pillow formed of bones,
And ate some crackers noisily
To cover up the groans.
:iconDirk-Cjeli:Dirk-Cjeli
:icondirk-cjeli:Dirk-Cjeli 2 29
Literature
This poem is bad - Skip it.
Now I'm a man with little rhyme
A cow could better describe a fine
Woman's face or define
The meaning of life, my saving grace
My inhibition, to write a line
That I am sitting here, not keeping pace
With the football, I'm not inclined
Not yet so lazy to sit and face
The television, the opiate
To the estranged masses
Pandora's Box, we've opened it
Found biscuits and molasses
So we sit, our arses growing
Not caring if our waists are bulging
For we are now indulging
In the best, or worse, there is to offer?
:iconDirk-Cjeli:Dirk-Cjeli
:icondirk-cjeli:Dirk-Cjeli 1 55

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Dirk-Cjeli
United Kingdom
Current Residence: London, England
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:iconsparrowsong:
SparrowSong Featured By Owner May 19, 2009  Hobbyist Writer
Augustine! Nazis! [link]
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:iconthehungerartist:
TheHungerArtist Featured By Owner Jul 17, 2007
Good name.
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:iconsparrowsong:
SparrowSong Featured By Owner Jun 3, 2007  Hobbyist Writer
Since I've no idea when you return to England, I won't be sending further letters. I think seven is enough, anyway--that's almost one a week.

Be well.
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:icondirk-cjeli:
Dirk-Cjeli Featured By Owner Jun 14, 2007
But the letters didn't arrive! Woe unto me!
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:iconsparrowsong:
SparrowSong Featured By Owner Jun 16, 2007  Hobbyist Writer
I have no power to correct that.
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:icondirk-cjeli:
Dirk-Cjeli Featured By Owner Jun 20, 2007
もちろん!Ah well. Home as of this saturday, we can talk then. I have a bloody huge bump on my head right now, christ....
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(1 Reply)
:iconaladdin-sane:
Aladdin-Sane Featured By Owner Feb 17, 2007
I have a friend, his name was Rob
He often wears a suit
And when he starts to sing a song
I pelt him with some fruit

Of course his suit is therefore doused
In colours not-quite black
And when he tries to wipe it off
I'll only throw it back

One day I hope he'll see the point
Of this quite sordid thing:
He really ought not to wear clothes
Each time he tries to sing.
Reply
:icondirk-cjeli:
Dirk-Cjeli Featured By Owner Feb 24, 2007
What insanity is going on here?
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:iconsparrowsong:
SparrowSong Featured By Owner Feb 25, 2007  Hobbyist Writer
I visited your page a few days back
To ask for your words, but alas and alack
Pete came along and read what I said
And added some verses, to fill you with dread.

So now you are caught,
and penned by his power,
so follow his plot
and sing in your shower.
Reply
:icondirk-cjeli:
Dirk-Cjeli Featured By Owner Feb 26, 2007
I have a friend called Peter
Whose name confuses my meter;
It makes me depressed
While I try to impress
And makes me drink wine by the litre.

But when it comes, however, to Audrey,
My rhymes get decidedly tawdry;
I return to the booze,
I'm destined to lose,
Now I've only myself and my laundry.


Lol, my first one of these the last time Pete and I spoke in verse was appalling too. There's a plateau I have to overcome en route.
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(1 Reply)
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